10 Sex Tips You Haven’t Heard A Million Times Before

A little experimentation never hurt anyone’s sex life.

To help couples in long-term relationships stretch their imaginations, we asked sexperts from around the country to share one piece of unconventional advice. See what they had to say below.

1. Watch each other masturbate.

“How taboo to bring your secret pleasure out into light, right? Touch yourself the way you normally would to bring an orgasm, just in front of your honey while they are doing the same. Allow watching them get turned on turn you on ― it can feel like live porn.” ― Keeley Rankin, a sex therapist in San Francisco

2. Direct your own sex scene.

“For a couple that is used to engaging in more vanilla or conventional sex, thinking about what would make them really turned on with their partner can turn things up. Try to create a story or movie scene out of it. Think about this scenario from start to finish with all of the details. Have your partner do the same. Take turns sharing the explicit details about how turned on you are, what exactly would happen, what you would both do to each other, and what you’d be wearing, as if you’re telling a story from a dirty book or watching a movie scene. Sometimes, just being really explicit with your desires and vocalizing them can be enough of a shift to wake up a tired relationship.” ― Kristin Zeising, a sex therapist in San Diego

3. Breathe.

“‘Take big relaxing breaths’ isn’t the raciest sex tip, but it is incredibly effective. A few relaxing breaths can help you refocus your attention back on the sensation when you find yourself mentally distracted or anxious. Breath can also increase arousing sensations and give you stronger orgasms. When in doubt, take a few deep breaths and pay attention to how your body feels. Breath is the most underestimated sex tool around!” ― Chris Maxwell Rose, a sex educator and the creator of the Pleasure Mechanics online courses

4. Have oral sex without the expectation of an orgasm.

“Get past intercourse-focused sex and get passionate about oral sex. Instead of the same licks and tricks, try different techniques to stimulate your partner orally including long strokes with the tongue, sucking lightly and gently on all parts of the genitals and exploring your partner’s body with your mouth. Take your time and don’t focus on an orgasm. Instead focus on pleasurable sensations for your partner. ” ― Shannon Chavez, a psychologist and sex therapist in Los Angeles

5. Enjoy the sexual buildup.

“We know from the research of Rosemary Basson that often, especially for women, desire is responsive, not spontaneous. This means that willingness and being open and receptive to a sexual experience is key. When you are receptive to sexual stimulation ― having your hair stroked, body caressed, kissing ― more often than not, the body responds, and it’s through arousal that desire kicks in.” ― Megan Fleming, a New York City-based sex therapist and the author of Invisible Divorce: Finding Your Way Back to Connection

6. Objectify your partner.

“Oftentimes, we transition to romantic love with our long-term partners and stop thinking of them sexually. In doing so, we stop objectifying them. Objectification isn’t always a bad thing in a healthy relationship. It can be extremely exciting and arousing. I encourage couples to bring that raunchy, dirty, kinky side of them back into the relationship, and to integrate their inner sex god or goddess into their relationship persona.” ― Moushumi Ghose, sex therapist and author of Classic Sex Positions Reinvented

7. Develop a signature move.

“One of the things that makes sex with a special someone leaving you wanting more is their signature move. If you think about the best lovers you’ve had, they’ve all probably had one. Pick what you love to do that drives your partner wild and do that often, with slight variation or in new environments. One of the hottest things in having sex with the same person is that you learn an unspoken language that only the two of you share, full of hot secrets.” ― Anne Ridley, a sexologist and owner of Modern Aphrodite, an online pleasure boutique

8. Do it somewhere you know you shouldn’t.

“The monotony of the bedroom or the couch can kill a sex life. Try changing the location, and I’m not talking from the bed to the floor. The next time you go to your friend’s house for a dinner party, sneak away to their bathroom. The next time you’re parked in a dark semi-private lot, squeeze in a quickie. It doesn’t even need to be full intercourse. Go oral or use your fingers for an old-school makeout vibe. The key here is to create an exciting and risky experience that will ignite some fresh energy between you both. Hopefully, it will then transfer back to the bedroom.” ― Lisa Paz, a sex therapist and marriage and family therapist in Miami

9. Stop thinking and let your body take over.

“Stop judging every thought you have and worrying about whether you are doing sex ‘right.’ There is no right or wrong way to be a lover. Simply be present and aware of your body sensations and be open to exploring the range of erotic pleasures.” ― Janet Brito, a psychologist and sex therapist at the Center for Sexual and Reproductive Health in Honolulu

10. Get handsy.

“Spend time enjoying light arousal even when sex isn’t on the menu. Too many couples only bother to get excited together when they’re about to have sex ― as if feeling aroused is some kind of unpleasant state that has to be relieved as quickly as possible by having an orgasm. The happiest couples enjoy feeling aroused together even when there’s no time or opportunity to have sex ― just because it feels good. It doesn’t have to be full-on arousal ― maybe you’re just playing footsie under the table at a restaurant. Sometimes it can be nice to just feel a bit turned on ― then to let it pass, without having to drive it to a conclusion.” ― Stephen Snyder, a sex therapist in New York City and the author of Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long-Term Relationship

17 Quick Sex Tips For Beginners

New to sex? Here are some tips advanced people provided you. Heed this and all will be well. Enjoy that special moment!

1. WASH

“Wash first.”

—Wavesignal

2. RELAX

“Relax and have fun. Enthusiasm is sexier than whatever else you could possibly do.”

—PatheticPathologist

3. ASK

“Ask your partner what they enjoy and listen. My partner guided me through what she liked on my first time which made it far more enjoyable for both of us.”

—awasteofgoodatoms

4. LICK

“Lick it before you stick it.”

—Quortek

5. TOUCH

“Touch your partner in places other than the obvious places: back, arms, scalp..etc.”

—Julienbabylegs

6. SLOW

“Start SLOW. You don’t want to rip anything down there.”

—charlemagna

7. FOREPLAY

“Foreplay helps a lot. Ignore anyone who says the clitoris is difficult to find. It is literally front and center. Small tight circles with your tongue on there and you can’t go too far wrong. Don’t go sucking on it; some girls are into that, but most are not. Start like a hummingbird trying to get nectar out of a flower; end like a bulldog trying to get the last lick of peanut butter out of the jar.”

—Portarossa

8. TALK

“Talk about it, it’s awkward, but you need to know what you both want.”

—PM_ME_YOUR_BODY69

9. ENJOY

“Have fun—forget being nervous—well, OK, this is pretty hard the first few times, but you’re having fun, try to enjoy it and not view it as a race to the finish line.”

—markth_wi

10. MASTURBATE

“Masturbate.

Learn about yourself first. Find out what you like, where you like it, and how you like it. Actual sex will be different, but you’ll understand the feelings and your pressure points. Being able to guide him ‘a little to the left,’ ‘slower,’ ‘harder’ (not constantly, just once in a while) will increase your enjoyment, which will make you better (there’s a big difference between when a woman is really enjoying herself and when she’s just going through the motion) and it will likely be a turn on for him for you to be into it and giving direction.

Also, don’t over think it. Let your mind turn off and your body do the work. Sex is weird and the second you think ‘What should I do with my hands…?’ You’ll start to feel awkward. If you just let go and go with it you will have a much better time.”

—AstarteHilzarie

11. COMMUNICATE

“Communicate. 90% of good sex is knowing what you like, finding out what your partner likes, and making an effort to accommodate both.”

—abunchofsquirrels

12. PACING

“Pace yourself. Take your time, caress, etc. The key is to enjoy the moment, not being in your head trying to figure out what to do next.

If you are a man, use position changes to stall off ejaculation. It gives you a moment to calm down without saying anything. And don’t drink ahead of time, as that has a negative effect on your erection.

If you are a woman, get out of your head. Stop thinking about what you look/smell/emotional like, and just focus on the sensations of being touched the way you want. If the man does something you don’t like, move his hand gently. If you are really enjoying it, make noises so he keeps doing that. Men are not mind readers, so you have to give him guidance if what he is doing is good or not. Move sensually—do not just lie there—unless he is really doing a terrible job. He will get the point if he does one thing and you act like an ironing board and he does another thing and you are writhing around. You can’t just be still the entire time.

Good sex is not all about the man. The woman has to be able to focus her attention and let the man know what feels good without making him feel bad.

It’s a dance, not a Rubik’s cube. Enjoy yourself. And be safe.”

—Ventusername

13. LAUGH

“Laugh at the weird and awkward bits. Dump ’em if they can’t laugh about it. Best sex ever comes with someone who isn’t insanely serious about it.

When inserting something into someone it can help to put your fingers in the someone first and guide the something along your fingers- that way you don’t miss the mark and end up breaking anyone’s anything.

Touch touch touch touch touch. Don’t go straight for the genitals—that’s boring. Tickle them a little, play with nipples, grab their butt, stroke their thighs. Try different ways of touching in many different areas.

You can stop penetration and go back to other things. So often we see sex as a one lane one-way street. But if you get tired, or you get a leg cramp, or you just aren’t feeling it stop and go back to something else. Sex is a lot more fun if the goal stops being for all involved parties to have an orgasm and instead becomes about giving and getting all of the flavors of pleasure.

Contrary to popular wisdom, there is such a thing as too much lube—but it is really really hard to get there. Better to have too much lube than too little.”

—4_sandalwood

14. PILLOW

“Put a pillow under her butt if you’re doing missionary. It makes for a better angle for both of you.”

—FLYBOY611

15. TEASE

“From my experience with women: Don’t go straight for the pussy, in fact try to go EVERYWHERE else before even putting your hand down there. For most women the anticipation will get them all worked up (in a good way).
That said, my advice for women getting with a man: go straight for the dick.”

—l3ane

16. FINGERS

“She’s a lot less likely to care about you not lasting a long time if your fingers are magical.”

—SuddenlyPorno

17. CALM

“Calm the fuck down! It’s not the be-all-end-all human experience. Thinking so will get you way over excited and you’ll probably bust your nut way too soon, or if you’re a girl, it will lead you to some heartbreaking disappointment. Your partner is a human being. So are you. You’re enjoying part of the human experience, something that’s fairly routine for many people, though not necessarily for you…yet. It’s a lovely physical and emotional experience (usually), but it’s not ‘heaven on earth’ and all that shit, especially when you’re a total beginner. So just calm down, enjoy the moments, learn how to do it right as you go, and eventually it will become something amazing, something worth getting your panties in a twist over…with the right person. Of course, telling a virgin to calm down when they’re about to get laid for the first time is about as effective as holding up an umbrella against a tsunami. But try to remember the principle at least.”

10 Telltale Signs of Sexual Frustration

Fed up with not gettin’ any? You are not alone. Take a look at /r/DeadBedrooms on Reddit sometime. People all over the world are having less amounts of sexy time in life than they’d hoped for, or they need, to be happy.

And, this doesn’t just entail having sex with a partner. I’m talking about a severe lack of orgasms- which certainly includes masturbation. Experiencing a lack of sexual outlets is a really difficult thing to deal with, because it can so powerfully and negatively affect us on physical, mental and emotional levels.

I implore you, do us all an enormous favor and be sure to have plenty of orgasms, either by yourself or safely with a partner. Not only will it feel fantastic, your improved attitude and behavior will be apparent and much very appreciated by everyone around you!

Let’s delve into the top 10 telltale symptoms and signs of sexual frustration:

1. Negatively Overreacting

Have you ever been treated so rudely, unfairly and unjustly by someone that your immediate reaction was, “Man, they really need to get laid?” Well, this assessment is probably right on track. And, if you act this way towards someone else, ask yourself if the same logic applies to you, “Was I just super rude to them because I’m ridiculously horny?” If the answer is yes, then you know the drill.

2. Living Vicariously

If you are constantly probing others for the juicy details of their private sexual encounters, it’s likely that you aren’t having enough of your own. This can even go so far as pushing others to hook up, just to hear about how the action went down afterwards. Alternately, if you are single and are the one being pressured by your peers for specific details, this is a clear indication of their seemingly stagnant and unsatisfactory sex lives.

3. Giving up on Getting Laid

Does getting laid ever again seem completely hopeless at this point in your life? Have you stopped caring about your level of hygiene, grooming and clothing as a result of this? Feeling as though there is no possible scenario in which you could ever get any again is a sure sign of sexual frustration. Don’t let a lag in the action cause you to spiral out of control and to entirely give up on sex.

4. Substituting Food and other Stimulants

Sexual impulses can become a form of compulsion. If you have an addictive personality and you love sex, but you’re not having any, it’s common to substitute this good feeling with another one. When you are unfulfilled sexually, you may turn to excessive eating, drinking or other substances to fill the emotional void that formerly sex had satisfied. The next time you want to eat or drink out of frustration, try masturbating instead, and you’ll burn up some calories and feel much healthier than you would after stress eating an entire pizza or downing a handler of vodka.

5. Hypersensitivity

Has your once mega-developed sense of humor flown out the window? Did you used to be able to take a joke and now you fly off the handle when someone yanks your chain (or you frequently imagine that’s what they are doing, even when they’re not)? Feeling ultrasensitive is a sure sign of sexual derailment. Rather than feeling insecure and hypersensitive, why not try a sensitive condom with your partner. This will bring your sense of humor back to the forefront and thicken your skin to the opinions and teasing of others.

6. Jealous Rages

When the object of your affection isn’t putting out, it’s highly likely for the more frustrated member of the relationship to fly into a jealous rage when their lover shows someone else attention and/or affection. People who were once their friends, or even their celebrity crushes, may suddenly seem like threat to your sex life, even though they never were before. Talk to your partner about the frequency, quality and duration of your sexual activities in an open and honest way. This will let them know how much sex means to you and how they are making you feel less secure in your own skin by holding out.

7. The Desire to Commit

This may defy logic, but sometimes people end up committing to one another when the frequency of sex wanes. Commitment offers a sense of wellbeing and comfort, just like sex does. If you’re not feeling as close to them sexually as you once were, it is easy to assume that making a stronger commitment to one another will solve this emotional distance problem. Occasionally, couples will commit to each other after the sexual aspects of their relationship have slacked off, as a means of reconnecting.

8. Depressed Pouting

When you find yourself in the dark, in a fetal position, wearing all black and listening to sad songs, ask yourself, “When was the last time I had a mind-blowing orgasm?” The answer may surprise you. If it has been longer than normal since your last endorphin releasing body quake, hop on the orgasm train and you will be feeling more like yourself in no time. Post-orgasm urges may even include pulling back the curtains to let in the sunshine and cranking up your favorite pop group’s single for a loud sing along.

9. Flaunting It

You’ve seen them around in bars, clubs, at the grocery store and in restaurants around happy hour. These sexually frustrated people are overflowing out of their two-sizes-too-small clothes like a busted open can of biscuits, are laughing a little too loudly and are constantly scanning the area for wedding ring-less patrons. Sexual frustration can lead to desperation, which unfortunately, isn’t very sexy at all. If you find yourself in this position, tone down the neediness vibe and you’ll be more likely to attract a quality lay, who won’t object to wearing a condom. When you feel the desire to excessively flaunt it, masturbating before you go out can be an immense help in taming down this urge.

10. Falsifying Information

Did you receive a mass text message or read a post on a social media site about how someone you know went through an entire box of Caution Wear Wild Rose’s last night? Is a person in your life perpetually bragging, in public, about needing Trojan Magnums XLs? Exaggerating or fabricating information about sex can be a telltale sign of someone who is, in reality, very sexually frustrated. While listening to lies about sex can be annoying and eye-roll worthy, realize that these people actually need your compassion because they are most likely extremely sexually frustrated.

sexual positions

Most popular Types of sexual positions

When it comes to the sex, every person has their own requirements. Sex is really beneficial in terms of health, satisfaction and other things. If you want to relive the stress, then it would be an ideal option for you. The best sex position will provide you with enough pleasure. There are thousands of popular sexes positions are out there, but you must opt for the best. According to the American researchers, most of the people are asking favorite sex position. However, most of the people prefer doggy’s style sex position followed by 69, cowgirl and oral sex.

With the assistance of Alison’s sex blog, you can grab a lot of information regarding sex positions. However, over 35% of people prefer doggy style position because it is providing enough relaxation to female’s orgasm. Following are the most popular sex positions.

  1. Oral sex

Nowadays, people in developed countries prefer oral sex over other positions because it is associated with the stimulation of genitalia. However, as per the researcher, it is quite dangerous for the eyes. However, as per researchers, people who are doing oral sex they are suffering from the AIDS and STD. If your partner has any type of gum infections, then you shouldn’t prefer such a position.

  1. Cowgirl

Most of the girls prefer cowgirl position because it is offering enough enjoyment to them. A cowgirl will sit on the top and will able to face her lover. As per experts, while doing the sex, a boy can get easily such the boobs. Therefore, it can improve the health and stamina as well.

  1. Missionary

If you are choosing the escort services, then you must opt for the missionary position. One can achieve such a position without struggling much. You will able to enjoy the new experience.

  1. Swiss Ball blitz

In this positional, your male partner will seat on the ball. Overall, it is best potions that will add high-end bounces to the thrust. If somebody wants full enjoyment, then he/she must prefer the Swiss Ball Blitz position.

  1. The pogo stick

It would be difficult to achieve a pogo stick position because it requires more attention and power. The man will have to hold the full weight of the woman. Make sure that you are bouncing her up perfectly.

  1. Butter churner

Alison’s sex blog can be beneficial for you because it is providing a lot of information about sex positions. However, you will find plenty of sex positions, and butter churner is one of them. It is most advanced position, where a woman lies, and man has to stand. It is old-fashioned that will give more relaxation and comfort to a woman.

  1. Randy Raft

Randy raft is performing under the water. As per researchers, it is best ever sex position where you will obtain more enjoyment.

Ultimately, if you are looking for the best position, then you most read above-mentioned important points. Make sure that you are choosing the best position that will give satisfaction to you and your partner.